Two little girls and supernatural love...

     I worked at an afterschool program for many years. We had children from pre-K to 4th grade. It was a popular program in my small town, and during the summer it became all day childcare. I loved the littlest ones, and so my time was spent with them. We took lots of field trips in the summer. Hiking, swimming, parks with ice cream, moto-cross. We did it all.

     And then, one summer morning a dirty, angry, and very challenging four year girl and her mother walked through the door of Husky Club and God knit her tight into my heart that very minute. 

     The only way to explain it is that God placed a supernatural love for her into me for his purpose under heaven. 

     She was not an easy child to love. She was mean and didn't make friends. She smelled bad and wore the same sets of dirty clothes every week. She got bullied about it. Her mother was raising her by herself. The child had never met her father, and Mom had addiction issues. She was a hot mess. But I befriended her, knowing she needed support, and she began to trust me.

     This precious girl looked so much like my niece Tiffany at that age. This coincidence did not escape God, and I smile as I write this, because that alone helped me love her. 

     When Tiffany was four, she stayed with us while her Mom worked for almost a year and she became part of our family. I loved her so much. My sister was raising her alone too, and this did not escape God either. 

     There were so many times, while spending time with my new little Husky Club girl, that I was suddenly back in my living room in Oklahoma with my 3 kids and my niece Tiffany. They had the same haircut, the same huge brown eyes, precocious nature, awkward clumsiness, and huge vocabulary.
    And, like Tiffany, this little ones father had walked away, leaving her broken. .
      One afternoon when the Mom came to pick her up, I asked if I could help them. She began to cry, but said I could. So that Saturday, I picked my girl up and we went shopping. We started with personal bathroom supplies. I bought her a pretty pink box with a handle and we filled it with Shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste, a brush a comb, scrunches and barrettes. I told her that she had to let her mother wash her hair and not to fight with her about it. I told her that she had to brush her teeth and put lotion on after a bath. The skin on her feet and elbows was so dry it was scaly. 

     She smiled so much that day, and stood up a littler taller. We held hands when I walked her to her door. I asked Mom about child's dirty clothes, and found out they didn't have a washer or dryer. It was expensive and far to go to the laundromat and they had no car, so the Mom could only to laundry when she saved enough money and had a ride. I learned that day too, that they rode the town shuttle to and from school each day. 

     So with tears in her eyes, Mom helped me load all their clothes into trash bags so I could take them home and wash them. The next weekend, I went to Kmart and bought them some knew clothes. Jeans and a jacket for Mom, and lots of pretty new school clothes for my girl. 

     The Mom said she had never felt so loved, and thanked me from the bottom of her heart. I invited them to church, and they came a few times. We picked them up, and Paul and I prayed for them.

     Cynthia became a different child at school. She was kinder, smiled more, felt like a normal girl. Her

hair was clean, her clothes new. Such simple things made such a difference. 

      They had a Christmas tree that year with presents underneath it, but in time, the Mom's drug addiction grew worse. 

     The sweet girl spends the night with us from time to time, just like Tiffany used to. The last time was a week ago and I still haven't put her bed away. Last Friday she was unusually quiet as I drove her the 40 miles to school after our sleepover. But when I glanced in the rear view mirror to check on her, it was Tiffany that I saw sitting there  and God's quiet voice laid a word on my spirit. "Remember." he said.

     Quiet tears ran down my cheeks for the remainder of the drive as God reminded me of the prayers I had prayed for Tiffany over the years. Her life too had been full of struggle, but I knew in that moment that God had heard every cry of her heart. I felt his love for her, and he reminded me of His promises over both their lives.  I could not fix all the things broken in the life of the little girl I drove to school that day, or her Mothers. But I could love them, pray for them, and trust God for the rest.   

     And when He reminded me of the words he whispered to me just a few weeks before, I pulled into the school wiping tears off my cheeks. And as I opened the door for the little girl who sat in the back of my car, my smile was full and deep.
     Cynthia's hand was inside mine as we walked to the classroom, but between them, in that small space that held us together was so much more. There was faith for her life inside our hands. There was hope for God's promises over it.
     When I got home that night I sent Tiffany a text telling her that God had reminded me about her life that day. That He showed me his love for her, reminded me of his promises for redemption over her life.
     Right after I sent the text, I opened an email from my sister, Kay, Tiffany's mother, telling me that Tiff had located her grandmother and grandfather. These were people Tiffany had never met. They were 94 and 97 and she would be meeting with them this week.

     But life with my girl and her Mom got really tough after that. The Mom had shoulder surgery and got addicted to Oxy. She got mean and out of control. Hateful when I told her she needed help. 

    Almost three years had gone by since the day I'd met them when I showed up unannounced with groceries. I'd been told that week by my girl, that they were out of food. Mom didn't want to let me in when she opened the door and saw mw, but I went in anyway. 

     I saw a broken child's tent set up on the living room floor in front of the cable TV. I asked questions. The girl answered them while Mom yelled and told her to shut up. But I learned that the tent  was now the girls bed and that another person had moved in to the her room. When I asked why she couldn't sleep with her Mom, I was told that Mom had friends over a lot that slept with her. 

    My heart ripped open wide as I walked back to my car, and I immediately reported everything I knew to child services, then I cried all the way home. 

     I made a second report a few weeks later, when the child's teacher told me she was sleeping in class all day and wearing the same clothes to school over and over. The girl told me she watched TV all night which was why she was tired. 

     The Mom stopped opening the door when I came over, and screamed at me to leave them alone.

      I didn't know what else I could do. 

      I asked Paul if he was up to becoming foster parents, so we could take her for awhile, but he wasn't sure he could do it. Honestly, I wasn't sure I could either. I was drained, completely exhausted. So I prayed. I had really given everything I had to them. 

     Then I remembered that the uncle of the child's biological father had been to Mammoth a few times to help them, and I knew that I still had his number, so I called him the next day. He said he would take some time off, and come to help as soon as possible. 

      Paul listened to me cry myself to sleep that night, but in the morning, I had a peace that surpassed the circumstances. God reminded me of the love we had showed them. The care we had given. Our job from that day forward was to pray and trust Him. He reminded me of His words. "I am your Redeemer. I transform hearts and breath new life."

     So I did just that. I trusted and let God be their Redeemer.   

     Years passed, and I hugged the girl whenever I saw her in town, and Mom got better. She hugged me in the grocery store one day and didn't want to let go. She looked good. She told me she had a car now, and a job. She said that our girl was doing good in school. 

I didn't ask questions. I didn't need to.

     Then I got a message out of the blue one day that the her daughters 8th grade graduation was coming up. The evening of it, I snuck in late and sat in the back. While her daughter stood on stage, the Mom found me and hugged me again. 

     Inside that hug was the knowledge that God had accomplished something beautiful and good by putting us together all those years ago. It mattered. It was all worth it. 

     And in that moment, God's love for ME overwhelmed my spirit and I heard his quiet promises to me again.  "I am your Redeemer. I transform hearts and breath new life."

      And when Mom let me go from the hug, I handed her the flowers I was holding. "For our girl," I told her. And my heart was full.

' I said. It is truly full and deep.